yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize