I must be too annoying 4 u.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
