Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
