let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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