sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
