what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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