I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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