So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I just gift wrapped bread.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
