did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
