so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
