Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
