so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize