Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize