About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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