she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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