She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
