careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
