What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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