Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I have post one night stand depression
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