and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
The cops high fived after they tackled you
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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