I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
