escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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