that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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