Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
