we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Randomize
