Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
