I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
