Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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