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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.

  (1-706): View more from Georgia

  Where's it at?

  (706): View more from Georgia

  In your pants.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing

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• (563): View more from Iowa

  Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms

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• (574): View more from Indiana

  Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?

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