im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Randomize
