that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Randomize
