Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
