it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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