told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
