he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
