they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I still have a little drunk in my system
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
