Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
