one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
two words: eviction party
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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