Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
