I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Randomize
