VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
