I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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