i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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