I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
