your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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