So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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