hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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