I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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