i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
