Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Damn victory sex feels great
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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