Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
